Amanda Hedges will never forgive herself for ‘forgetting to live’.
Amanda Hedges, a 31-year-old from Brisbane, has shared an emotional message after being diagnosed with terminal brain cancer. Her journey, filled with regret over lost time, serves as a powerful reminder to live life fully while we can.
A Life of Work and Worry
Amanda spent most of her life focused on work, responsibilities, and worrying about the future. She believed she had plenty of time to experience life’s joys—like seaside vacations, casual Costco trips, or simply indulging in the little things. Her impressive health record reinforced this belief, as she’d never been hospitalized and expected to live a long life, much like her relatives.
But in September, Amanda’s life took a devastating turn. She was diagnosed with Glioblastoma, an aggressive and terminal brain cancer. Now, despite undergoing rounds of chemotherapy and radiotherapy, she knows her condition cannot be cured.
“The idea is to extend my life; the cancer won’t go away,” Amanda shared.
The Diagnosis That Changed Everything
The first warning signs appeared as light headaches, which Amanda initially attributed to a change in her anxiety medication. A routine MRI, suggested by her psychiatrist, revealed a mass in her brain. Initially, doctors reassured her that many brain tumors are benign, but further tests confirmed the worst—her tumor was malignant.
Amanda’s world crumbled when her doctor informed her she had only 15 months to live. Glioblastoma, typically diagnosed in older adults, has a grim prognosis, with most patients surviving between three and 24 months.
The Burden of Regret
Looking back, Amanda is consumed with regret over how she spent her time.
“I wasted 30 years of my life doing nothing and still got cancer,” she said. “If I had my time again, I would do everything differently. I would book holidays, go to buffets, and spend less time worrying about money and the little things.”
She also laments not prioritizing relationships and experiences, realizing now that her friends and family are her greatest support system.
“None of my old bosses or colleagues are sitting with me during chemo,” Amanda reflected. “It’s my mum, dad, and friends who are here for me.”
Making the Most of Limited Time
With time running out, Amanda has created a bucket list of experiences she hopes to complete before her treatment resumes on January 23. Her dreams include staying at a beachfront hotel to listen to the waves, revisiting Australia Zoo to see Robert Irwin perform a show, and indulging at an all-you-can-eat buffet without worrying about the cost.
Despite her limited mobility due to ongoing treatment, Amanda’s determination to embrace life remains strong.
“I want to stay at a hotel on the beach and forget that I’m dying. Forget that I’m me,” she said. “Be someone else for a few days and just relax.”
Financial Struggles and Support
Amanda’s medical expenses have been staggering. Despite having top-tier health insurance, costs like radiotherapy at $750 per week and a $1,000 FETPET scan have drained her savings. She’s now relying on Centrelink payments and has started a GoFundMe to cover both her bucket list and ongoing medical expenses.
“I looked up hotels on the beach in Caloundra, but they’re $3,000 a week. It’s shocking,” she said.
A Final Message to Others
Amanda’s story is more than just a personal tragedy; it’s a wake-up call. She urges others to reflect on how they’re living their lives and to stop taking time for granted.
“I wish I could live again so I could stop worrying about the little things and enjoy myself,” she said. “Spend time with people who matter, travel, meet someone, have kids. Just live.”
As her condition remains stable for now, Amanda’s focus is on making the most of the time she has left. She dreams of going on a short cruise and dining at Sushi Train without mentally calculating every plate’s cost.
While Amanda faces an uncertain and heartbreaking future, her courage and reflections leave a lasting impact, reminding us all to cherish the present and prioritize what truly matters.